well, i'm currently sitting in the amsterdam airport, using the free wi-fi (wi-fi in kenya was nonexistent in most places), and eating my twelve dollar breakfast (do you realize how many chapatis i could have bought with twelve dollars?!)
so, a summary of my last week in kenya, and then some reflections on my experience.
sunday i took the bus back from mombasa to nairobi. of course it was more than an hour late, but i've just came to accept things like that. i didn't feel to sad saying goodbye to the heat of the coast. one of the girls on my program said that it was 95-100 degrees for many of the days we were there. we made it back to nairobi at about 7:00, which allowed us to see the christmas lights that decorated prestige plaza. christmas lights in kenya?!.. who would have thought?
we got a taxi to the methodist guest house, where we spent the next three days taking exams, sharing internship experiences, and participating in a wrap-up seminar. the hotel was much more than most of us expected, complete with buffet meals (no more ugali!) and a swimming pool.
wednesday morning we headed back to our nairobi homestay families for a few more days with them. a girl on the program was kicked out of her homestay (apparently she was supposed to call them while she was in mombasa, and she didn't, so they didn't want her to return) so she stayed with me.
i spent my last few days in kenya just simply enjoying myself-- eating at a swank indian restaurant with the rest of the students, handing in all of my term papers, chilling by the pool at the guest house again, going to markets, and eating multiple milkshakes.
saturday came, and it was time to leave kenya. it still all feels really surreal, it hasn't quite hit me that i'm really going home. my flight didn't leave until 11:00 at night. getting through security was a breeze and the flight went well. the flight was about eight hours. i have a seven hour layover and then another eight hour flight to chicago.
i do not know how to express my feelings on these last 3 1/2 months of my life. hands down, this has been the most amazing experience of my life. when the flight was taking off last night, i couldn't help but feel sad to think about never returning. what if i never ride in a matatu again? what if i never shop at the secondhand markets to buy 30 cent shirts? what if i never ride a pikipiki every again? these questions, plus multiple others, filled my mind. i feel like i experienced so many "firsts" on this trip, it makes me sad to think i could have also had my "lasts." i guess it's a good thing to feel this way-- it means i really enjoyed myself and want to come back.
one of the issues discussed in the wrap-up seminar was reverse culture shock. for many, coming back to the consumeristic and materialistic culture of the united states is worse than seeing the sheer poverty of kenya. i've lived a much simpler life these past few months than i have ever before. although there are certain conveniences of the united states i'm looking forward to coming back to, i do believe most americans live with too much, and they are not any happier than kenyans that live on next-to-nothing. one of the things i've learned is that material items will not make me happy. although not ever single second of these last 3 1/2 months have been the most joyous times of my life, my experiences and insight on the world that i've gained will make me happier than any material item would be able to.
another thing discussed in the seminar was enduring the hardships associated with explaining your experiences to people back home. living in a developing, third world, sub-saharan africa country for 3 1/2 months has made me realize the discrepancies in u.s. media coverage to kenya and other similar areas. to everyone reading this-- get educated. there are so many stereotypes associated with kenya and africa as a whole, and it's due to american ignorance.
i won't lie, i had no idea what i was getting myself into when i decided to come to kenya. but i do know i've grown so much as a person, being able to experience life through a different lens, being able to view the united states from the outside. i don't want to say i'm a whole different person though. i'm still me, just with some new views on the world, and some great stories to share. :)
one of the students on the program became slightly obsessed with steve jobs after his death in october. he shared a wonderful quote with us from him. i think the quote really envelopes my thoughts on not only the last 3 1/2 months of my life, but also on the rest of my life.
"When you grow up you tend to get told the world is the way it is and you're life is just to live your life inside the world. Try not to bash into the walls too much. Try to have a nice family, have fun, save a little money.
That's a very limited life. Life can be much broader once you discover one simple fact: Everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you and other people can use.
Once you learn that, you'll never be the same again."
future blog postings if i get back to the u.s. and feel the need to post. otherwise,
kwaheri kenya, kuona tena (goodbye kenya, see you again).
-emma
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Saturday, December 3, 2011
msambweni, the final week...
well, the internship portion of my study abroad program has officially came to an end. a week in review....
i decided to go back to MCH (maternal and child health) for the week, weighing and measuring babies and young kids. it keeps me busy, although i don't see as much as i might if i went to the wards. in the wards, a lot of time is just spent sitting around waiting for new admissions, which i did not want to do.
so monday, tuesday, and thursday i went to MCH. before this week, i felt like the internship had gone by so fast and i wished it was longer. but this week really made me believe that six weeks is just the right amount of time-- many of the doctors and other staff at the hospital are extremely rude to the patients, and also SO LAZY. i'm not even getting paid, and i often felt like i was doing the work of five of the staff in MCH. so it was about time to leave...
wednesday and friday i went to theatre. dr. stan (the orthopedic surgeon from germany) refused to operate last week, claiming that there were not adequate supplies to successfully or safely do any operations, but he was back in action this week. i saw an amputation of the lower leg of a diabetic woman. so cool. other operations were fixing a femur fracture, a surgical toilet, and a wound cleaning where they took the whole big toe off the foot. on friday i saw another c-section and some other minor procedures.
it was so weird thinking that i won't be in a hospital seeing the things i did the past six weeks for YEARS. interning at the hospital was such an amazing experience-- it really opened my eyes to the health disparities in this country, and helped me realize how great the healthcare in the united states is.
since i don't want to have to work on my term papers once i get back to nairobi, i finished those up, as well as studying for the final exams i have on monday. it's easy to forget i'm actually here for school sometimes....
saturday i woke up to watch a final sunrise over the indian ocean. then i said goodbye to my host family, and made my way to mombasa. i checked into my hotel and then met some other students to do some exploring/market shopping of mombasa, and then we headed to the beach for one final time.
tomorrow i take the bus back to nairobi (a long eight hour journey). then i have final exams and a final seminar, and then a few final days before my flight leaves next saturday. thinking of going home is very surreal for me right now. a part of me is ready to go home, but then another part of me feels like i just arrived yesterday, and that my time here shouldn't be over yet. i know i'm really going to miss kenya... this has hands-down been the most amazing experience of my life.
until next time,
emma
i decided to go back to MCH (maternal and child health) for the week, weighing and measuring babies and young kids. it keeps me busy, although i don't see as much as i might if i went to the wards. in the wards, a lot of time is just spent sitting around waiting for new admissions, which i did not want to do.
so monday, tuesday, and thursday i went to MCH. before this week, i felt like the internship had gone by so fast and i wished it was longer. but this week really made me believe that six weeks is just the right amount of time-- many of the doctors and other staff at the hospital are extremely rude to the patients, and also SO LAZY. i'm not even getting paid, and i often felt like i was doing the work of five of the staff in MCH. so it was about time to leave...
 |
| the hospital |
 |
| hospital hallway. the painted list on the wall is a list of a few of the services and their prices. |
 |
| hospital operating room |
 |
| anestesia room. more of a storage closet. |
it was so weird thinking that i won't be in a hospital seeing the things i did the past six weeks for YEARS. interning at the hospital was such an amazing experience-- it really opened my eyes to the health disparities in this country, and helped me realize how great the healthcare in the united states is.
since i don't want to have to work on my term papers once i get back to nairobi, i finished those up, as well as studying for the final exams i have on monday. it's easy to forget i'm actually here for school sometimes....
saturday i woke up to watch a final sunrise over the indian ocean. then i said goodbye to my host family, and made my way to mombasa. i checked into my hotel and then met some other students to do some exploring/market shopping of mombasa, and then we headed to the beach for one final time.
 |
| my house in msambweni |
 |
| final sunrise over the indian ocean. bittersweet. |
tomorrow i take the bus back to nairobi (a long eight hour journey). then i have final exams and a final seminar, and then a few final days before my flight leaves next saturday. thinking of going home is very surreal for me right now. a part of me is ready to go home, but then another part of me feels like i just arrived yesterday, and that my time here shouldn't be over yet. i know i'm really going to miss kenya... this has hands-down been the most amazing experience of my life.
until next time,
emma
 |
| pwani (coast) life, you'll be missed.... |
Thursday, December 1, 2011
top tens
hello everyone. only ten days until i'm stepping on american soil once again. so in keeping with the theme of 'ten', here are some "top ten" lists from my time in kenya....
top ten things i'll miss most about kenya...
10. the crazy ringtones kenyans have. the vibrate or silent setting is never used. personal favorite ringtones: jingle bells, and classic 1990's backstreet boys.
9. the outlets. they always say that if an electronic is plugged in, even if you aren't using it, it still uses electricity. solution: create an on/off switch on the outlet. genius.
8. the markets. goodwill is nice, but nothing beats thirty cent shirts.
7. chapati. mmm greasy, unleavened bread goodness. hands down my favorite kenyan food. personal record is five chapati in one day.
6. brick, old school cell phones. no people, we do not need cell phones with internet on them. no, we don't need a ridiculous amount of apps. let's all go back to a simpler time where cell phones were used just for calling people.
5. i've heard this song nonstop for the past three months. it always makes me smile when i hear it.. .http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_lTHjpRkMM&noredirect=1
4. all the little kids screaming "how are you?" whenever you walk past them. for many, it's the only english they know, and it's so cute watching them wave and scream to you. :)
3. the transportation. although matatus are infamous for how dangerous they are, it is such a convenient form of transportation. many kenyans do not have vehicles, and there is absolutely no need for them. also, pikipikis (motorbikes) are one of my favorite things about kenya.
2. the fresh fruit. mmm the pineapples and bananas were my absolute favorite. you just can't get fruit like that in the united states.
1. soda in a glass jar, drank with a straw. i don't know why, but it just tastes better like this. also, i'm really going to miss krest, a bitter lemon soda.
top ten things i WON'T miss about kenya...
10. their "lazy" behavior. it's a cultural thing not to work very hard, but i hear "i'm so tired" so many times at the hospital, even though they hardly do any work.
9. their driving. blind overtakings by matatu drivers can be scary. and they drive way too fast.
8. beach boys. no i don't want to buy your bracelets. no i don't want to buy your keychains. no i don't want to buy your necklaces. don't tell me you love me, after speaking with me for five minutes. just let me enjoy the beach by myself.
7. the gender roles of men and women. it is extremely rare to see a father with a kid. the mother always takes care of the kids, and women do all the work around the house. gender roles are so stratified, it's nice to know i'm from a country that believes we should be treated equally.
6. the limited variety of foods. i've had a few staple foods in my diet for the past three months, and hardly anything else. chapati, ugali, rice, fish, beef stew, potato soup, spaghetti. i like variety. i also will not miss eating foods i don't like, but forcing myself to because i have no other choice.
5. the smell of body odor. this is more just focused on msambweni, because it's so hot and everyone sweats so much. deodorant/antiperspirant were amazing inventions, use them.
4. the word "mzungu". heard multiple times a day. i have an actual name, you don't need to say "the mzungu" all the time instead.
3. the inappropriate times people think it's acceptable to answer their cell phones. while teaching class? why not. when working with patients? sure. during the middle of major surgery? i hope it's an extremely important call...
2. being taken advantaged of because of the color of my skin. don't charge me more just because i'm white, which makes you assume i have a ton of money.
1. ugali. tasteless white crap on a plate? no thank you. and it looks so much like mashed potatoes, i might be scarred for life thinking that my mashed potatoes are ugali.
top ten things i missed most about home... (this list excludes family and friends, those go without saying!)
10. air conditioning. so hot and humid here in msambweni all the time.
9. trashy television shows. seriously, where's keeping up with the kardashians when you just want to watch some awful television?
8. the food. specifically, the fast food. culver's, come back into my life.
7. water. always having water for a shower. being able to drink the water without sterilizing it first. having cold water, with ice cubes, when its 90 degrees out.
6. my sonicare toothbrush. i just love that thing so much, i definitely regret not bringing it with. my teeth just haven't felt as clean the past three months.
5. a washing machine. my clothes just haven't felt very clean. and in msambweni, they lay them on the ground to dry. doesn't the defeat the purpose of washing them?
4. the changing seasons. although the sun has been nice for my tan, i honestly miss the changing weather. summer year round is not as great as you might think (maybe i just love winter too much).
3. set prices for everything. i don't enjoy bargaining for items (because i know i'm not a good bargainer), and it's hard knowing that i'm probably paying much more for an item than a kenyan would.
2. english. there is no way of feeling more alone and isolated that hearing a foreign language all the time, and knowing most people don't know how to speak english. the language barrier has also been hard for me to get as much out of my internship experience, because all the doctor-patient contact is done in swahili.
1. the food (again). easily the single thing i miss most about home. i'll for sure be gaining those 15 pounds i lost here as soon as i get back home. christmas cookies and taco bell are calling my name...
top ten things i'll miss most about kenya...
10. the crazy ringtones kenyans have. the vibrate or silent setting is never used. personal favorite ringtones: jingle bells, and classic 1990's backstreet boys.
9. the outlets. they always say that if an electronic is plugged in, even if you aren't using it, it still uses electricity. solution: create an on/off switch on the outlet. genius.
8. the markets. goodwill is nice, but nothing beats thirty cent shirts.
7. chapati. mmm greasy, unleavened bread goodness. hands down my favorite kenyan food. personal record is five chapati in one day.
6. brick, old school cell phones. no people, we do not need cell phones with internet on them. no, we don't need a ridiculous amount of apps. let's all go back to a simpler time where cell phones were used just for calling people.
5. i've heard this song nonstop for the past three months. it always makes me smile when i hear it.. .http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_lTHjpRkMM&noredirect=1
4. all the little kids screaming "how are you?" whenever you walk past them. for many, it's the only english they know, and it's so cute watching them wave and scream to you. :)
3. the transportation. although matatus are infamous for how dangerous they are, it is such a convenient form of transportation. many kenyans do not have vehicles, and there is absolutely no need for them. also, pikipikis (motorbikes) are one of my favorite things about kenya.
2. the fresh fruit. mmm the pineapples and bananas were my absolute favorite. you just can't get fruit like that in the united states.
1. soda in a glass jar, drank with a straw. i don't know why, but it just tastes better like this. also, i'm really going to miss krest, a bitter lemon soda.
top ten things i WON'T miss about kenya...
10. their "lazy" behavior. it's a cultural thing not to work very hard, but i hear "i'm so tired" so many times at the hospital, even though they hardly do any work.
9. their driving. blind overtakings by matatu drivers can be scary. and they drive way too fast.
8. beach boys. no i don't want to buy your bracelets. no i don't want to buy your keychains. no i don't want to buy your necklaces. don't tell me you love me, after speaking with me for five minutes. just let me enjoy the beach by myself.
7. the gender roles of men and women. it is extremely rare to see a father with a kid. the mother always takes care of the kids, and women do all the work around the house. gender roles are so stratified, it's nice to know i'm from a country that believes we should be treated equally.
6. the limited variety of foods. i've had a few staple foods in my diet for the past three months, and hardly anything else. chapati, ugali, rice, fish, beef stew, potato soup, spaghetti. i like variety. i also will not miss eating foods i don't like, but forcing myself to because i have no other choice.
5. the smell of body odor. this is more just focused on msambweni, because it's so hot and everyone sweats so much. deodorant/antiperspirant were amazing inventions, use them.
4. the word "mzungu". heard multiple times a day. i have an actual name, you don't need to say "the mzungu" all the time instead.
3. the inappropriate times people think it's acceptable to answer their cell phones. while teaching class? why not. when working with patients? sure. during the middle of major surgery? i hope it's an extremely important call...
2. being taken advantaged of because of the color of my skin. don't charge me more just because i'm white, which makes you assume i have a ton of money.
1. ugali. tasteless white crap on a plate? no thank you. and it looks so much like mashed potatoes, i might be scarred for life thinking that my mashed potatoes are ugali.
top ten things i missed most about home... (this list excludes family and friends, those go without saying!)
10. air conditioning. so hot and humid here in msambweni all the time.
9. trashy television shows. seriously, where's keeping up with the kardashians when you just want to watch some awful television?
8. the food. specifically, the fast food. culver's, come back into my life.
7. water. always having water for a shower. being able to drink the water without sterilizing it first. having cold water, with ice cubes, when its 90 degrees out.
6. my sonicare toothbrush. i just love that thing so much, i definitely regret not bringing it with. my teeth just haven't felt as clean the past three months.
5. a washing machine. my clothes just haven't felt very clean. and in msambweni, they lay them on the ground to dry. doesn't the defeat the purpose of washing them?
4. the changing seasons. although the sun has been nice for my tan, i honestly miss the changing weather. summer year round is not as great as you might think (maybe i just love winter too much).
3. set prices for everything. i don't enjoy bargaining for items (because i know i'm not a good bargainer), and it's hard knowing that i'm probably paying much more for an item than a kenyan would.
2. english. there is no way of feeling more alone and isolated that hearing a foreign language all the time, and knowing most people don't know how to speak english. the language barrier has also been hard for me to get as much out of my internship experience, because all the doctor-patient contact is done in swahili.
1. the food (again). easily the single thing i miss most about home. i'll for sure be gaining those 15 pounds i lost here as soon as i get back home. christmas cookies and taco bell are calling my name...
Sunday, November 27, 2011
msambweni, week five
hello everyone. i hope you are all recovering from a food-filled thanksgiving holiday. this past week in msambweni has been pretty low-key and uneventful, but here's a recap of my week.
i stayed in the pediatric ward for another week, as i was only there for two days last week. so monday and tuesday were spent there, and i saw similar cases as last week. the saddest case i saw was a little seven year old boy in the hospital by himself. he was burned with a hot metal rod by his father after his stepmom accused him of raping one of her kids (he's seven years old! seriously?!?). they took him to the hospital, and after the hospital staff told them the police were going to come, they ran off, and now he is left at the hospital to recover by himself.
thursday i went on an mch (maternal and child health) outreach program to funzi island, an island off the coast just south of here. after a twenty minute car ride and a fifteen minute boat ride, we made it to the island. we mainly just had to record a lot of the information for the government. then we went back to the mainland, and had a vaccination outreach at the village there. it definitely was not a traditional thanksgiving by any means, but it was surely a memorable one.
friday night, the msid students planned on getting together for our own thanksgiving meal. i left work early and headed to mombasa. we originally planned to go to an ethiopian restaurant (it's more of a communal eating thing), but we weren't sure if the restaurant actually existed, so we decided to go to an indian restaurant instead. i ordered butter chicken, and almost immediately after finishing my meal, i started to feel sick. i planned on staying the night at a friend's house just north of mombasa. we found a matatu, and i found a plastic bag. i won't go into details, but i'll just say it was an extremely unpleasant ride to her house. once i got everything out of my system, i felt much better, but let's just say that that will probably be my first and only time eating at an indian restaurant.
i was originally planning on going to shimoni and wasini island for the weekend, but after friday night, i thought it'd be better to keep it low-key and rest. so on saturday i just went to the beach with a few other students and headed back home to msambweni saturday afternoon.
in one week, i'll be on a bus heading back to nairobi, and in exactly two weeks, my plane will be touching down in chicago. i'm looking forward to going back to nairobi just to escape the heat-- it's getting so hot here, it's almost becoming unbearable (even the fan isn't helping much). i'm going to try to finish up most of my papers this week and study for my final exams.
until next time,
emma
:)
i stayed in the pediatric ward for another week, as i was only there for two days last week. so monday and tuesday were spent there, and i saw similar cases as last week. the saddest case i saw was a little seven year old boy in the hospital by himself. he was burned with a hot metal rod by his father after his stepmom accused him of raping one of her kids (he's seven years old! seriously?!?). they took him to the hospital, and after the hospital staff told them the police were going to come, they ran off, and now he is left at the hospital to recover by himself.
thursday i went on an mch (maternal and child health) outreach program to funzi island, an island off the coast just south of here. after a twenty minute car ride and a fifteen minute boat ride, we made it to the island. we mainly just had to record a lot of the information for the government. then we went back to the mainland, and had a vaccination outreach at the village there. it definitely was not a traditional thanksgiving by any means, but it was surely a memorable one.
friday night, the msid students planned on getting together for our own thanksgiving meal. i left work early and headed to mombasa. we originally planned to go to an ethiopian restaurant (it's more of a communal eating thing), but we weren't sure if the restaurant actually existed, so we decided to go to an indian restaurant instead. i ordered butter chicken, and almost immediately after finishing my meal, i started to feel sick. i planned on staying the night at a friend's house just north of mombasa. we found a matatu, and i found a plastic bag. i won't go into details, but i'll just say it was an extremely unpleasant ride to her house. once i got everything out of my system, i felt much better, but let's just say that that will probably be my first and only time eating at an indian restaurant.
i was originally planning on going to shimoni and wasini island for the weekend, but after friday night, i thought it'd be better to keep it low-key and rest. so on saturday i just went to the beach with a few other students and headed back home to msambweni saturday afternoon.
in one week, i'll be on a bus heading back to nairobi, and in exactly two weeks, my plane will be touching down in chicago. i'm looking forward to going back to nairobi just to escape the heat-- it's getting so hot here, it's almost becoming unbearable (even the fan isn't helping much). i'm going to try to finish up most of my papers this week and study for my final exams.
until next time,
emma
:)
Monday, November 21, 2011
msambweni, week four
hello to everyone back home. :)
last weekend (november 12/13) was a lazy weekend. on saturday, i went to diani beach to soak up some sun. sunday, i wasn't feeling well, so i laid around doing nothing all day. don't worry, it wasn't anything serious and i felt better by midday.
this past week i went to the pediatric ward (although i did not spend much time there). monday was my first day. i was showed around, and followed one of the doctors around the rest of the day. the ward is full of crying, screaming kids, and similar conditions are seen over and over again-- malaria, anemia (caused by the malaria), pneumonia, and malnutrition. many of the children with pneumonia need careful supervision, as they often contracted HIV through their mother. for many of the patients, blood samples need to be taken. this seems to be the most tedious part of the pediatric ward, as their veins are so hard to find and they kick, scream, and squirm the entire time. on thursday, i also went to the pediatric ward, and saw similar cases.
tuesday, i headed to ramisi, a small village just south of msambweni. there was a four-day polio vaccination outreach going on, and i went with my host father for the day. all children under five years old should get the vaccine. it's just two drops taken orally, and then a mark is put on their finger nail to show they got the vaccine. first we went to the primary school, then the nursery, and then door to door, looking for kids. i was the designated "marker", so that is what i did for a few hours. it was nice to get out of the hospital and see an even more rural area than msambweni (think of an entire village of mud huts).
wednesday and friday i went to theatre (surgery). the cases varied, but i saw a few cyst removals, a c-section, and a man that needed the wound in his foot cleaned, but eventually he will just have to have it amputated, because it is not healing.
the weekend was spent at malindi, a large tourist area about two hours north of mombasa. historical significance: after portuguese explorer vasco da gama sailed around the cape of good hope, malindi is where he erected a coral pillar and turned east to head towards india.
i left msambweni friday afternoon, with plans of staying with an msid friend in bamburi, a town just north of mombasa for the night. it took 2 1/2 hours to get there-- a 1 1/2 hour matatu ride to likoni, a ride on the ferry, and another 45 minutes out of mombasa to bamburi. i made it around 4:30. we went to the beach for awhile, where we met up with a couple other msid students, and then went to her house for the night.
saturday morning we met up with two other msid students to find a matatu to malindi. after being hassled by the matatu conductors (as usual), we found one and were on our way. we stopped in gedi to visit the gedi ruins, which is a 14th-17th century swahili village.
afterwards, we ate lunch and headed to malindi. we got to our hotel, and decided to explore the town/beach the rest of the day. we ate supper at a restaurant called "i love pizza", as malindi has a large italian influence, and most of the tourists are from italy. i got a calzone, hands down the best thing i've eaten in four weeks since moving to msambweni.
that night, we decided to go out and see what the nightlife is like in malindi. prostitution is a huge problem on the coast, and mainly what we saw was old (50-70 years old) white men, with young kenyan prostitutes. it's so sad to see how many women exploit themselves for little money, and to see men who think what they're doing is acceptable.
sunday, we ate breakfast and headed to marafa depression, aka hell's kitchen. after an hour's drive on a bumpy, noisy, gravel road, we finally made it to our destination. marafa depression is sometimes called "the grand canyon of kenya"-- it's a large canyon as a result of wind erosion. it was very neat to see, although there's really no comparison to the actual grand canyon. ;)
after making it back to malindi, we went to malindi marine park to go snorkeling. malindi is supposed to have some of the best snorkeling along the coast, and we couldn't pass up hiring a boat for two hours and having snorkeling gear provided for us, all for six dollars. the snorkeling was absolutely amazing-- so much coral, so many cool colored fish, it is indescribable.
we left malindi around 5:00, and i still had a 4 1/2 hours journey home. i knew i was in for a long evening. we found an "express" matatu to mombasa-- one that doesn't make any stops, so it was much quicker. we ran into some traffic issues near mombasa which slowed us down, but i made it across the ferry to likoni around 8:15. i knew i might run into problems if matatus stopped running, but i thought it was still early enough.
this is where my weekend went sour. me and an msid student that lives in likoni walked off the ferry, and we tried to find a matatu to msambweni. we were told by another matatui'd have to take a taxi, around $15. just great. so he told us he'd ask his taxi driver "friend" to take us. we were told to stand on the opposite side of the street while they talked. they both came over to us, we tried to negotiate a price, but the taxi driver wanted more money. the taxi driver walked back to his car with the matatu driver. the matatu driver came back to us, and told me to give him 1500 ($15), so i assumed they had agreed on a price. about five minutes later, the matatu driver came back and asked for 200 more ($2), and that would be final. i only had a 1000Ksh bill, so he said he'd find change for me. he walked off, with 2500 ($25) of my money, and was never seen again! i still needed to get home, so i ended up paying 2000 ($20) to the taxi driver to get me home. on the way home, the taxi driver said that he wasn't friends with the matatu driver and had never seen him before in his life.
this event is one of the hardest things to deal with in kenya. you want to trust people, as most kenyans are sincere, friendly people, that just want to help you. but this is an example of the "rotten eggs" you can sometimes find. the matatu driver seemed friendly, and in no way led us to believe otherwise. it is hard because if i am skeptical of all kenyans, my experience with them won't be very good, but at the same time, if i trust them, i could end up in bad situations, like i was.
overall though, i still had a great weekend. there is no point in "crying over spilled milk"-- this experience is just about living and learning, life will go on and i learned my lesson (and i guess it makes for a good story, too).
i hope everyone enjoys their thanksgiving holiday. :)
emma
last weekend (november 12/13) was a lazy weekend. on saturday, i went to diani beach to soak up some sun. sunday, i wasn't feeling well, so i laid around doing nothing all day. don't worry, it wasn't anything serious and i felt better by midday.
this past week i went to the pediatric ward (although i did not spend much time there). monday was my first day. i was showed around, and followed one of the doctors around the rest of the day. the ward is full of crying, screaming kids, and similar conditions are seen over and over again-- malaria, anemia (caused by the malaria), pneumonia, and malnutrition. many of the children with pneumonia need careful supervision, as they often contracted HIV through their mother. for many of the patients, blood samples need to be taken. this seems to be the most tedious part of the pediatric ward, as their veins are so hard to find and they kick, scream, and squirm the entire time. on thursday, i also went to the pediatric ward, and saw similar cases.
tuesday, i headed to ramisi, a small village just south of msambweni. there was a four-day polio vaccination outreach going on, and i went with my host father for the day. all children under five years old should get the vaccine. it's just two drops taken orally, and then a mark is put on their finger nail to show they got the vaccine. first we went to the primary school, then the nursery, and then door to door, looking for kids. i was the designated "marker", so that is what i did for a few hours. it was nice to get out of the hospital and see an even more rural area than msambweni (think of an entire village of mud huts).
wednesday and friday i went to theatre (surgery). the cases varied, but i saw a few cyst removals, a c-section, and a man that needed the wound in his foot cleaned, but eventually he will just have to have it amputated, because it is not healing.
the weekend was spent at malindi, a large tourist area about two hours north of mombasa. historical significance: after portuguese explorer vasco da gama sailed around the cape of good hope, malindi is where he erected a coral pillar and turned east to head towards india.
i left msambweni friday afternoon, with plans of staying with an msid friend in bamburi, a town just north of mombasa for the night. it took 2 1/2 hours to get there-- a 1 1/2 hour matatu ride to likoni, a ride on the ferry, and another 45 minutes out of mombasa to bamburi. i made it around 4:30. we went to the beach for awhile, where we met up with a couple other msid students, and then went to her house for the night.
saturday morning we met up with two other msid students to find a matatu to malindi. after being hassled by the matatu conductors (as usual), we found one and were on our way. we stopped in gedi to visit the gedi ruins, which is a 14th-17th century swahili village.
afterwards, we ate lunch and headed to malindi. we got to our hotel, and decided to explore the town/beach the rest of the day. we ate supper at a restaurant called "i love pizza", as malindi has a large italian influence, and most of the tourists are from italy. i got a calzone, hands down the best thing i've eaten in four weeks since moving to msambweni.
 |
| the view of the ocean from our hotel balcony. |
that night, we decided to go out and see what the nightlife is like in malindi. prostitution is a huge problem on the coast, and mainly what we saw was old (50-70 years old) white men, with young kenyan prostitutes. it's so sad to see how many women exploit themselves for little money, and to see men who think what they're doing is acceptable.
sunday, we ate breakfast and headed to marafa depression, aka hell's kitchen. after an hour's drive on a bumpy, noisy, gravel road, we finally made it to our destination. marafa depression is sometimes called "the grand canyon of kenya"-- it's a large canyon as a result of wind erosion. it was very neat to see, although there's really no comparison to the actual grand canyon. ;)
after making it back to malindi, we went to malindi marine park to go snorkeling. malindi is supposed to have some of the best snorkeling along the coast, and we couldn't pass up hiring a boat for two hours and having snorkeling gear provided for us, all for six dollars. the snorkeling was absolutely amazing-- so much coral, so many cool colored fish, it is indescribable.
we left malindi around 5:00, and i still had a 4 1/2 hours journey home. i knew i was in for a long evening. we found an "express" matatu to mombasa-- one that doesn't make any stops, so it was much quicker. we ran into some traffic issues near mombasa which slowed us down, but i made it across the ferry to likoni around 8:15. i knew i might run into problems if matatus stopped running, but i thought it was still early enough.
this is where my weekend went sour. me and an msid student that lives in likoni walked off the ferry, and we tried to find a matatu to msambweni. we were told by another matatui'd have to take a taxi, around $15. just great. so he told us he'd ask his taxi driver "friend" to take us. we were told to stand on the opposite side of the street while they talked. they both came over to us, we tried to negotiate a price, but the taxi driver wanted more money. the taxi driver walked back to his car with the matatu driver. the matatu driver came back to us, and told me to give him 1500 ($15), so i assumed they had agreed on a price. about five minutes later, the matatu driver came back and asked for 200 more ($2), and that would be final. i only had a 1000Ksh bill, so he said he'd find change for me. he walked off, with 2500 ($25) of my money, and was never seen again! i still needed to get home, so i ended up paying 2000 ($20) to the taxi driver to get me home. on the way home, the taxi driver said that he wasn't friends with the matatu driver and had never seen him before in his life.
this event is one of the hardest things to deal with in kenya. you want to trust people, as most kenyans are sincere, friendly people, that just want to help you. but this is an example of the "rotten eggs" you can sometimes find. the matatu driver seemed friendly, and in no way led us to believe otherwise. it is hard because if i am skeptical of all kenyans, my experience with them won't be very good, but at the same time, if i trust them, i could end up in bad situations, like i was.
overall though, i still had a great weekend. there is no point in "crying over spilled milk"-- this experience is just about living and learning, life will go on and i learned my lesson (and i guess it makes for a good story, too).
i hope everyone enjoys their thanksgiving holiday. :)
emma
Saturday, November 12, 2011
oh, baby! msambweni week three
hello everyone. many of you reading this may have experienced the first snowfall of the season. HA. i'm sitting here sweating in the 85 degree heat.
anyway, last saturday (november 5), i headed to tiwi beach, a beautiful beach about 45 minutes north of msambweni. i was meeting most of the other students on the program that are also interning along the coast. it was so wonderful to see them, as it can get lonely not seeing familiar faces. many talked about being homesick and lonely, so i wasn't the only one feeling that way the first week i was here, which made me feel better. we stayed at twiga lodge, a hotel with cheap rooms and a nice restaurant, and a picturesque beach.
everyone else came together from the north, so i met them at the beach around 10:00 saturday morning. we swam for a while (the waves were huge!), ate lunch, and headed out snorkeling. i wasn't expecting much from the snorkeling, as it only cost around five dollars, but it was very cool. the first reef was in the shape of africa, and the second one, named "australia", was actually a cave, with an opening in the roof with long vines hanging down, and the sun shining through. after we snorkeled for a few hours, we headed back to the beach to soak up a few more rays. we all took showers and then headed to supper. after supper, we had a bonfire on the beach, which was a lot of fun.
the next morning a few of us woke up early for the sunrise. i live close enough to the beach that i could watch the sunrise any morning, but 5:30 just isn't an ideal wake-up time...
we stayed by the beach for a few more hours, then everyone headed their seperate ways to head home. i stopped at nakumatt for some food, then headed the rest of the way home to msambweni. it was a wonderful weekend.
this week at the hospital i was in the maternity ward. this was the first week i was in an inpatient service, so it was interesting to see the daily ward schedule. at 8:30, the ward round begins. the doctors go around to each patient, asking how they're feeling, if their condition is improving, take vitals, and write a plan for additional treatment. there were about 25 women in the maternity ward while i was there, and many of those were mothers waiting to be discharged after having a c-section. others were antenatal mothers having preganacy problems. the ward round took about three hours. the rest of the day was spent waiting for new admissions or deliveries.
i saw quite a few deliveries throughout the week. one day, a woman gave birth to premature (28 weeks) triplets, each not weighing much over two pounds.
my time in maternity was very good. i became much more competent in my blood pressure skills, and i also was able to administer drugs both through IV and intramuscular. i did not actually help in the delivery of any babies, but the last week of my internship i might go back to the maternity ward.
on friday, i headed to theatre. there were four orthopedic operations. the orthopedic surgeon is a european man, so it was very interesting to see the dynamic between him and the other theatre staff (the surgeon pretty much acted like they were completely incompetent in everything, which is sadly partially true.) there were two broken legs where the surgeon had to insert screws, a surgical toilet (flushing the wound with water-- "dilution is the solution for pollution" is what i was told), and a little girl with a swollen knee, which the surgeon just thought was fluid, but there is something else wrong with it.
the surgeon told me that the theatre fee for any operation is 3000 Ksh (30 dollars), and the screws are provided by an NGO in the united states that replaces the used screws for free, otherwise the patients would not be able to afford them. throughout my time in the ward, i learned that most of the doctors that work at the hospital are just interns, finishing up their medical school requirements. in kenya, to become a doctor, it is only a 4 1/2 year program total. there are also many student nurses, as there is a medical teaching facility in msambweni. so, fees at the hospital are very minimal, which is all many can afford, but the services are provided by medical students or student nurses, so nobody is well trained. after seeing much of the stuff that goes on at the hospital, i would NOT want to get sick and have to go there.
sunday to tuesday was a large muslim holiday. my host family is muslim, so there were many people in and out of the house all those days. many of my host cousins did not go to school, and instead stayed home to dance and sing to islamic prayer videos. many people here seem very ignorant about how important getting an education is. although i understand that for many muslims, their religion is their life, i don't know how it can be more important than school.
another aspect of education ignorance is my house help. she is 12 or 13 years old, and does not go to school. she is one of my host mom's daughters, from a different father other than my host dad. she knows only a limited amount of english, so i'm assuming she stopped going to school after my host brother (age 2 1/2) was born, so she could stay home to care for him. i don't know how anyone could tell their child that they could no longer go to school, and instead had to stay home to cook, clean, and babysit. she will have such a hard life, probably just being a housewife for the rest of her life, an occupation that many women here seem to have.
the following are some pictures of my homestay...
well, that's all for now. in exactly four weeks, i'll be boarding a plane back home. time is flying by.
anyway, last saturday (november 5), i headed to tiwi beach, a beautiful beach about 45 minutes north of msambweni. i was meeting most of the other students on the program that are also interning along the coast. it was so wonderful to see them, as it can get lonely not seeing familiar faces. many talked about being homesick and lonely, so i wasn't the only one feeling that way the first week i was here, which made me feel better. we stayed at twiga lodge, a hotel with cheap rooms and a nice restaurant, and a picturesque beach.
 |
| tiwi beach |
everyone else came together from the north, so i met them at the beach around 10:00 saturday morning. we swam for a while (the waves were huge!), ate lunch, and headed out snorkeling. i wasn't expecting much from the snorkeling, as it only cost around five dollars, but it was very cool. the first reef was in the shape of africa, and the second one, named "australia", was actually a cave, with an opening in the roof with long vines hanging down, and the sun shining through. after we snorkeled for a few hours, we headed back to the beach to soak up a few more rays. we all took showers and then headed to supper. after supper, we had a bonfire on the beach, which was a lot of fun.
the next morning a few of us woke up early for the sunrise. i live close enough to the beach that i could watch the sunrise any morning, but 5:30 just isn't an ideal wake-up time...
 |
| tiwi beach sunrise |
we stayed by the beach for a few more hours, then everyone headed their seperate ways to head home. i stopped at nakumatt for some food, then headed the rest of the way home to msambweni. it was a wonderful weekend.
this week at the hospital i was in the maternity ward. this was the first week i was in an inpatient service, so it was interesting to see the daily ward schedule. at 8:30, the ward round begins. the doctors go around to each patient, asking how they're feeling, if their condition is improving, take vitals, and write a plan for additional treatment. there were about 25 women in the maternity ward while i was there, and many of those were mothers waiting to be discharged after having a c-section. others were antenatal mothers having preganacy problems. the ward round took about three hours. the rest of the day was spent waiting for new admissions or deliveries.
i saw quite a few deliveries throughout the week. one day, a woman gave birth to premature (28 weeks) triplets, each not weighing much over two pounds.
my time in maternity was very good. i became much more competent in my blood pressure skills, and i also was able to administer drugs both through IV and intramuscular. i did not actually help in the delivery of any babies, but the last week of my internship i might go back to the maternity ward.
on friday, i headed to theatre. there were four orthopedic operations. the orthopedic surgeon is a european man, so it was very interesting to see the dynamic between him and the other theatre staff (the surgeon pretty much acted like they were completely incompetent in everything, which is sadly partially true.) there were two broken legs where the surgeon had to insert screws, a surgical toilet (flushing the wound with water-- "dilution is the solution for pollution" is what i was told), and a little girl with a swollen knee, which the surgeon just thought was fluid, but there is something else wrong with it.
the surgeon told me that the theatre fee for any operation is 3000 Ksh (30 dollars), and the screws are provided by an NGO in the united states that replaces the used screws for free, otherwise the patients would not be able to afford them. throughout my time in the ward, i learned that most of the doctors that work at the hospital are just interns, finishing up their medical school requirements. in kenya, to become a doctor, it is only a 4 1/2 year program total. there are also many student nurses, as there is a medical teaching facility in msambweni. so, fees at the hospital are very minimal, which is all many can afford, but the services are provided by medical students or student nurses, so nobody is well trained. after seeing much of the stuff that goes on at the hospital, i would NOT want to get sick and have to go there.
sunday to tuesday was a large muslim holiday. my host family is muslim, so there were many people in and out of the house all those days. many of my host cousins did not go to school, and instead stayed home to dance and sing to islamic prayer videos. many people here seem very ignorant about how important getting an education is. although i understand that for many muslims, their religion is their life, i don't know how it can be more important than school.
another aspect of education ignorance is my house help. she is 12 or 13 years old, and does not go to school. she is one of my host mom's daughters, from a different father other than my host dad. she knows only a limited amount of english, so i'm assuming she stopped going to school after my host brother (age 2 1/2) was born, so she could stay home to care for him. i don't know how anyone could tell their child that they could no longer go to school, and instead had to stay home to cook, clean, and babysit. she will have such a hard life, probably just being a housewife for the rest of her life, an occupation that many women here seem to have.
the following are some pictures of my homestay...
 |
| the shower. |
 |
| living room |
 |
| the bathroom, complete with a porclain squatter. ;) |
 |
| my room. thank god for that fan. |
 |
living room with baby tv that blasts islamic prayer videos almost nonstop. |
well, that's all for now. in exactly four weeks, i'll be boarding a plane back home. time is flying by.
Friday, November 4, 2011
week two in msambweni
hello everyone!
i have concluded the second out of six weeks at the hospital. time is flying by-- i've already completed 1/3 of my time at my internship, and i'm already 2/3 of the way done with the semester. it's crazy to think that in just over a month, i'll be on a plane flying home, looking back on an amazing few months.
last sunday (oct 30) i headed to ukunda, a small town about 25 minutes north of msambweni. it is very close to diani beach, a large tourist area, with many expensive hotels lining the coast. my host dad has a motorbike instead of a car, and he was going to take me there, but he decided not to at the last minute, so i boarded a matatu instead. i made it to ukunda, then got on a different matatu to head towards the beach. destination: nakumatt (kenyan walmart). my host family does not feel the need to provide me with toilet paper, so i was on a mission to buy some. in addition to that, i wanted to buy some "real"food-- ice cream, peanut butter, cookies-- to eat for the day, as at home, my diet consists of six foods: ugali, fish, chapati, coconut rice, potato soup, and black tea. after buying a few items, i headed to the beach to check it out.
as a single white woman, i knew i was going to be hassled by "beach boys"-- kenyan guys that try to sell you things, or just converse with you. throughout my 3 hours i was at the beach, there was not one time i was there sitting alone by myself, as someone was always talking to me. at about 3:00, i decided to head home, after realizing i probably just got the worse sunburn of my entire life. not only is the sun much stronger since i'm practically on the equator, but one of the side effects of my anti-malarial medication is sun sensitivity. needless to say, i learned my lesson: if i think i've applied enough sunscreen, apply more.
on the way home, the matatu driver decided it would be okay to pack 22 people into the 14 passenger matatu. most of the extra people were hanging outside the vehicle, holding on for their life. oh kenya.
this week at the hospital, i was in MCH-- maternal and child health. it is an outpatient clinic where children under five come for regular checkups and see a doctor if they're sick, as well as where antenatal mothers come for checkups throughout their pregnancy. on monday, tuesday, and thursday, i did a lot of weighing kids, measuring their height, taking their temperature, and giving vitamin a supplements. kids are supposed to come once every month for the first five years of their life, but many stop coming after they've received most of their immunizations. i don't blame them-- i think coming that often is excessive, even by american standards. on wednesday, i worked with the antenatal mothers. the nurses estimate how old the fetus is, check for a heartbeat, are given counseling in delivering the baby (doing it in a health facility, not a home delivery), and are tested for hiv. they do not use an ultrasound, and the way they estimate how old the fetus is seems very unreliable.
friday was theatre (surgery) day. i had been looking forward to this day all week. although working in mch was nice, theatre is really my opportunity to see stuff i'm unable to in the united states. at the hospital, major surgeries are done on wednesdays, and gynecological surgeries are done on fridays, so now i'll go every wednesday and friday to theatre. i had to wear the scrubs, along with the hair net and face mask. although i only observed today, as i go there more often, i'm sure the nurses will gain confidence in me in doing some of their work. there were two small cervical surgeries, removal of warts, and a woman getting her tubes tied. The tube tying procedure was the coolest to watch-- cutting down to the fallopian tubes, watching the surgeon tie them, and suturing the cut back up. seriously, it's like real life grey's anatomy.
life here has became much more comfortable. not having a toilet doesn't even phase me anymore, and my house doesn't having running water about half the time, so i'm getting good at the whole "bucket bath". my host mom realized how much i love chapati (fried flat bread) and i have it all the time-- usually for two meals of the day. i'm not getting used the heat/humidity, but i usually go swimming every afternoon after work.
the beach boys that hassle me here are probably my biggest pet peeve about this place. i go swimming around the same time every day, so many of them know my name and feel the need to wait for me to talk to me every day. one day, a guy was sitting by my towel, and he told me he was watching it so no one stole it, even though i know my stuff is very safe here. he proceeds to ask me if i can help him with his "problems"-- when have i became a psychologist?! when i told him no, he asked when we could meet. gahhhhhi'm not angry, i just wish there was one day i could go swimming and not be harassed by anyone." maybe he'll leave me alone now...
one of my other pet peeves that's been growing on me is the work ethic i see a lot at the hospital. from an american perspective, i see people as very lazy. they don't do a very good job on their work, show up late, take extremely long lunch breaks, and are rude to patients. i understand that this is part of their culture (more relaxed, not concerned about the time), but i definitely feel that it is one of the reasons kenya is in the situation it is in-- if they want any progress to be made with reducing the amount of poverty in their country, they need to start working a lot harder than they are.
well, that's all for this week! i'm heading to tiwi beach for the weekend to meet up with the other msid students, and next week i'm headed to the maternity ward (delivering babies, anyone?!).
stay warm wisconsin!
emma
:)
i have concluded the second out of six weeks at the hospital. time is flying by-- i've already completed 1/3 of my time at my internship, and i'm already 2/3 of the way done with the semester. it's crazy to think that in just over a month, i'll be on a plane flying home, looking back on an amazing few months.
last sunday (oct 30) i headed to ukunda, a small town about 25 minutes north of msambweni. it is very close to diani beach, a large tourist area, with many expensive hotels lining the coast. my host dad has a motorbike instead of a car, and he was going to take me there, but he decided not to at the last minute, so i boarded a matatu instead. i made it to ukunda, then got on a different matatu to head towards the beach. destination: nakumatt (kenyan walmart). my host family does not feel the need to provide me with toilet paper, so i was on a mission to buy some. in addition to that, i wanted to buy some "real"food-- ice cream, peanut butter, cookies-- to eat for the day, as at home, my diet consists of six foods: ugali, fish, chapati, coconut rice, potato soup, and black tea. after buying a few items, i headed to the beach to check it out.
as a single white woman, i knew i was going to be hassled by "beach boys"-- kenyan guys that try to sell you things, or just converse with you. throughout my 3 hours i was at the beach, there was not one time i was there sitting alone by myself, as someone was always talking to me. at about 3:00, i decided to head home, after realizing i probably just got the worse sunburn of my entire life. not only is the sun much stronger since i'm practically on the equator, but one of the side effects of my anti-malarial medication is sun sensitivity. needless to say, i learned my lesson: if i think i've applied enough sunscreen, apply more.
on the way home, the matatu driver decided it would be okay to pack 22 people into the 14 passenger matatu. most of the extra people were hanging outside the vehicle, holding on for their life. oh kenya.
this week at the hospital, i was in MCH-- maternal and child health. it is an outpatient clinic where children under five come for regular checkups and see a doctor if they're sick, as well as where antenatal mothers come for checkups throughout their pregnancy. on monday, tuesday, and thursday, i did a lot of weighing kids, measuring their height, taking their temperature, and giving vitamin a supplements. kids are supposed to come once every month for the first five years of their life, but many stop coming after they've received most of their immunizations. i don't blame them-- i think coming that often is excessive, even by american standards. on wednesday, i worked with the antenatal mothers. the nurses estimate how old the fetus is, check for a heartbeat, are given counseling in delivering the baby (doing it in a health facility, not a home delivery), and are tested for hiv. they do not use an ultrasound, and the way they estimate how old the fetus is seems very unreliable.
friday was theatre (surgery) day. i had been looking forward to this day all week. although working in mch was nice, theatre is really my opportunity to see stuff i'm unable to in the united states. at the hospital, major surgeries are done on wednesdays, and gynecological surgeries are done on fridays, so now i'll go every wednesday and friday to theatre. i had to wear the scrubs, along with the hair net and face mask. although i only observed today, as i go there more often, i'm sure the nurses will gain confidence in me in doing some of their work. there were two small cervical surgeries, removal of warts, and a woman getting her tubes tied. The tube tying procedure was the coolest to watch-- cutting down to the fallopian tubes, watching the surgeon tie them, and suturing the cut back up. seriously, it's like real life grey's anatomy.
life here has became much more comfortable. not having a toilet doesn't even phase me anymore, and my house doesn't having running water about half the time, so i'm getting good at the whole "bucket bath". my host mom realized how much i love chapati (fried flat bread) and i have it all the time-- usually for two meals of the day. i'm not getting used the heat/humidity, but i usually go swimming every afternoon after work.
the beach boys that hassle me here are probably my biggest pet peeve about this place. i go swimming around the same time every day, so many of them know my name and feel the need to wait for me to talk to me every day. one day, a guy was sitting by my towel, and he told me he was watching it so no one stole it, even though i know my stuff is very safe here. he proceeds to ask me if i can help him with his "problems"-- when have i became a psychologist?! when i told him no, he asked when we could meet. gahhhhhi'm not angry, i just wish there was one day i could go swimming and not be harassed by anyone." maybe he'll leave me alone now...
one of my other pet peeves that's been growing on me is the work ethic i see a lot at the hospital. from an american perspective, i see people as very lazy. they don't do a very good job on their work, show up late, take extremely long lunch breaks, and are rude to patients. i understand that this is part of their culture (more relaxed, not concerned about the time), but i definitely feel that it is one of the reasons kenya is in the situation it is in-- if they want any progress to be made with reducing the amount of poverty in their country, they need to start working a lot harder than they are.
well, that's all for this week! i'm heading to tiwi beach for the weekend to meet up with the other msid students, and next week i'm headed to the maternity ward (delivering babies, anyone?!).
stay warm wisconsin!
emma
:)
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